the ultimate Strawberry Daiquiri
Although the name of this recipe post is The Ultimate Daiquiri, I'm going to break it down into two separate posts: Frozen Strawberry Daiquiri and Frozen Banana Daiquiri.
The Ultimate Frozen Strawberry Daiquiri
Ingredients:
1 Packet Frozen Strawberries
1 oz Bacardi Rum
2 oz Creme de Almond
Sweet 'n Sour Cocktail Mix
Crushed Ice
1 lg Fresh Strawberry
1 sprig Fresh Mint
Kool-Whip Dessert Topping
Preparation:
Place crushed ice into a beverage blender - about 3/4 full. Fill remander of blender with thawed frozen strawberries. Pour rum and creme de almond into blender. Fill with sour mix. Blend until thick and smooth. Remember, the longer you blend the mixture, the thinner it will become.
Presentation:
Pour frozen mixture into a tall, stemmed cocktail glass. Fill to 3/4 full. Spray a line whipping cream around the outside of the glass. Pouring mixture into the center, fill remainder of glass with frozen mixture. Do Not Overfill Glass! Spray a spot of whipping cream onto the center of mixture. Garnish with a large fresh strawberry pressed on the rim of the glass, and a spring of mint leaf placed stem down by the rim, beside the strawberry. The strawberry will look better with the stem still attached.
Tomorrow: The Ultimate Banana Daiquiri
Cheers!
And The Winner Is...
Voting for Madfish Willie's Ultimate Blogger Recipe Contest is over!
First of all, I would like to say Thank You to all the bloggers who submitted a recipe for this contest. There were many fine recipes, and I will have some fun testing many of these out personally. It was a really tough job to narrow the list down to the Top Ten for final voting.
The Madfish Willie's Ultimate Blogger Recipe Contest winner was... [ drum roll to build the tension ] Acidman from Gut Rumbles.
Here is a look at the final voting:
| Best Blogger Cocktail Recipe | ||
| Moneytov Cashtail |  8% | 5 |
| Black Martini |  5% | 3 |
| Venom & Blight |  8% | 5 |
| Fire Water |  6% | 4 |
| Malpractice |  0% | 0 |
| Big Stick Whack! |  5% | 3 |
| Gut Rumble |  26% | 16 |
| Moonlight on Water |  19% | 12 |
| Antarctic Cosmopolitan |  18% | 11 |
| Cool Colorado Conservative |  5% | 3 |
| 62 votes total | ||
Acidman wins a bottle of his favorite liquor for submitting this recipe:
Gut RumbleAcidman actively campaigned his readers to come over and Vote, and they did, resulting in what I'm told by Straight White Guy as an Acidbath. He sent over 350-400 visitors to my site! Three cheers for Acidman!
Make your own moonshine.
Distill it on the back porch and catch it in Mason jars.
Put a quart of that skullbuster in the freezer for a day or two.
Remove jar and pour two fingers of that cold likker into a clear glass.
Drink it down all at once.
Enjoy the fire in the belly, the tingle in the toes and the feeling of your hair standing on end.
Repeat as necessary until you are face-down on the floor, or arrested for running around nekkid and howling at the moon.
For a look at the complete Blogger Recipe list go here. I'll update this list so it will be easier to view. If I get enough secondary recipes in the comments, I'll run another voting for the same prize! Bullshit so far »
Ultimate Blogger Recipe Contest Finalists
These are the top ten recipes for The Ultimate Blogger Recipe Contest:
Harvey at Bad Money for Moneytov Cashtail
Matt at Blackfive for Black Martini
Kate at Electric Venom for Venom & Blight
Linda at Civlization Calls for Fire Water
Denita at Who Tends The Fires for Malpractice
Jeff at BigStick.US for Big Stick Whack!
Acidman at Gut Rumbles for Gut Rumble
SilverBlue at Ramblings of SilverBlue for Moonlight on Water
Eric at Straight White Guy for Antarctic Cosmopolitan
Darren at Colorado Conservative for Cool Colorado Conservative
The voting poll is now open on the sidebar with a link to the actual recipes. The voting parameters are set to 24 hours, so vote the Chicago Way - early and often. Polls close at midnight on October 31, Central Standard Time.
Thanks to everyone that entered a recipe... it was difficult to pick out only 10 for the poll.
I'm gonna have to try some of these out!!
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »The Ultimate Blogger Recipe Contestants
These were all the entries in the contest. I will pick the top ten recipes and post a PollHost.com poll in the sidebar until Halloween. The entry with the most votes wins! Voting can be done once every 24 hours, so vote the Chicago Way - early and often! The winner will be announced on November 1.
Moneytov Cashtail
Equal portions of:
Blue Raspberry Vodka
190 Vodka
Peach Pucker
Combine ingredients in a glass, aiming for a nice money-green color.
Garnish with a dollar-bill-bowtie:
Harvey: Bad Money
Black Martini
5 oz Johnny Walker Black
Over ice, shaken, not stirred
Strain into chilled Martini Glass [It better be a big one!]
Marichino cherry
Matt: Blackfive - The Paratrooper of Love
Bullshit so far »
» Electric Venom links with: Taste Test
» VodkaPundit links with: Bottoms Up
» De Doc's Doings links with: Happy 100!
» Note-It Posts links with: In tribute...
» Note-It Posts links with: In tribute...
» Note-It Posts links with: In tribute...
The Ultimate Pizza
The Ultimate Pizza recipe is from one of my old roommates. He was one funny guy. Watching TV with this guy was like being in a Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie! He would just sit there and wipe the whole movie out. He could recite verbatim entire sections of movies, his favorite being Monty Python & The Holy Grail. Meanwhile, back on the ranch...
Barry's Meatza Pizza
Ingredients:
1 Biboli Pizza Crust - Thick Crust
1 Italian Sausage - Crumbled
1 Canadian Bacon - Diced Big
1 Pepperoni - Diced Big
4 oz Prego Traditional Sauce
2 cups Mozzarella Cheese
Red Peppers
Parmesan Cheese
McCormicks Lemon Pepper
McCormicks California Style Garlic Salt
Directions:
Brown Italian Sausage, drain grease, paper soak top 2 times to remove remainder of grease
Brown Canadian Bacon, drain grease, paper soak top 2 times to remove remainder of grease
Preheat oven to 425
Sauce on Boboli - watch edges - too close to edge and the crust gets hard, burns
Top with meats - don't be afraid of the meat, either - pile it on
Bake 10 minutes at 425
Add Mozzarella Cheese
Bake 10 minutes at 425
Sprinkle red peppers to taste
Sprinkle Parmesan chesse to taste
Sprinkle spices to taste
Options:
Add large, sliced, sauteed mushrooms after meat and before first bake cycle.
This is a great recipe for football games and casual munching. Also tastes great first thing in the morning from the frig after a hard night's partying! Enjoy!
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »The Ultimate Strawberry Daquiri
Although the name of this recipe post is The Ultimate Dacquiri, I'm going to break it down into two separate posts: Frozen Strawberry Dacquiri and Frozen Banana Dacquiri.
The Ultimate Frozen Strawberry Dacquiri
Ingredients:
1 Packet Frozen Strawberries
1 oz Bacardi Rum
2 oz Creme de Almond
Sweet 'n Sour Cocktail Mix
Crushed Ice
1 lg Fresh Strawberry
1 sprig Fresh Mint
Kool-Whip Dessert Topping
Preparation:
Place crushed ice into a beverage blender - about 3/4 full. Fill remander of blender with thawed frozen strawberries. Pour rum and creme de almond into blender. Fill with sour mix. Blend until thick and smooth. Remember, the longer you blend the mixture, the thinner it will become.
Presentation:
Pour frozen mixture into a tall, stemmed cocktail glass. Fill to 3/4 full. Spray a line whipping cream around the outside of the glass. Pouring mixture into the center, fill remainder of glass with frozen mixture. Do Not Overfill Glass! Spray a spot of whipping cream onto the center of mixture. Garnish with a large fresh strawberry pressed on the rim of the glass, and a spring of mint leaf placed stem down by the rim, beside the strawberry. The strawberry will look better with the stem still attached.
Tomorrow: The Ultimate Banana Dacquiri
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »The Ultimate Banana Daiquiri
Although the name of this recipe post is The Ultimate Dacquiri, I'm going to break it down into two separate posts: Frozen Strawberry Dacquiri and Frozen Banana Dacquiri.
The Ultimate Frozen Banana Dacquiri
Ingredients:
2-3 Fresh Bananas
1 oz Bacardi Rum
2 oz Creme de Banana
Soft Blue Bell Premium Ice Cream
1 sprig Fresh Mint
Kool-Whip Dessert Topping
Preparation:
Place softened ice cream into a beverage blender - about 3/4 full. Fill remander of blender with peeled fresh banana. Pour rum and creme de banana into blender. Blender until thick and smooth. This should not take very long. Remember, the longer you blend the mixture, the thinner it will become.
Presentation:
Pour frozen mixture into a tall, stemmed cocktail glass. Fill to 3/4 full. Spray a line whipping cream around the outside of the glass. Pouring mixture into the center, fill remainder of glass with frozen mixture. Do Not Overfill Glass! Spray a spot of whipping cream onto the center of mixture. Garnish with slices of fresh banana placed around the rim of the glass, and a spring of mint leaf placed stem down by the rim.
Cheers!
The Emporer Redesign The Palace
Emperor Misha I of The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler has redesigned the palace.
His highness has seen fit to include me, The Imperial Tender of Bars, in his
Below is the full and complete text of the Imperial Post:
Redesigning the PalaceI most humbly accept this important position and do solemnly swear to uphold the duties and expectations of the office, so help me G-d! Bullshit so far »It struck us, in our infinite wisdom, that it was about time that we got around to linking the Imperial Tender of Bars, so we did. Recognizing that the services of such a person are vital to the continued assault on His Majesty's liver, we furthermore decided to stick his link in the Council so that we won't have to hunt around for it when we need to issue a fresh challenge to our Imperial Ethanol Dehydrogenase (gotta make that damn enzyme earn its keep, dammit!)
So welcome, newly appointed Imperial Mixer of Poisons, and, once the applause has died down, go get his Imperial Booziness a drink!
Also, it struck us as unfair that the Imperial Armorer (and Keeper of the Arsenal of Doom, Death and Destruction™) was languishing below, so we yanked him further up on the food chain as well.
Besides, considering the Arsenal, it would seem prudent for us to keep a close eye on this one. You never know when your former loyal minions decide to get funny ideas, after all.
The Ultimate Strawberry Daiquiri
Although the name of this recipe post is The Ultimate Daiquiri, I'm going to break it down into two separate posts: Frozen Strawberry Daiquiri and Frozen Banana Daiquiri.
The Ultimate Frozen Strawberry Daiquiri
Ingredients:
1 Packet Frozen Strawberries
1 oz Bacardi Rum
2 oz Creme de Almond
Sweet 'n Sour Cocktail Mix
Crushed Ice
1 lg Fresh Strawberry
1 sprig Fresh Mint
Kool-Whip Dessert Topping
Preparation:
Place crushed ice into a beverage blender - about 3/4 full. Fill remander of blender with thawed frozen strawberries. Pour rum and creme de almond into blender. Fill with sour mix. Blend until thick and smooth. Remember, the longer you blend the mixture, the thinner it will become.
Presentation:
Pour frozen mixture into a tall, stemmed cocktail glass. Fill to 3/4 full. Spray a line whipping cream around the outside of the glass. Pouring mixture into the center, fill remainder of glass with frozen mixture. Do Not Overfill Glass! Spray a spot of whipping cream onto the center of mixture. Garnish with a large fresh strawberry pressed on the rim of the glass, and a spring of mint leaf placed stem down by the rim, beside the strawberry. The strawberry will look better with the stem still attached.
Tomorrow: The Ultimate Banana Daiquiri
Cheers!
Hangover - Part V
So you wanna cure a hangover? I found this article a few months ago, and want to share it with you, while giving the appropriate credit the anonymous author(s) at soyouwanna.com
This article has five different sections:
- 1. Understand what alcohol does to your body.
2. Prepare for the night out.
3. Know what to do while you're drinking.
4. Survive the morning after.
5. Quaff our ultimate hangover cure.
Quaff The Ultimate Hangover Cure
Here it is: the fruit of all our painstaking research, The Almighty Hangover Emergency Cure. While the ingredients in this kit are based on hard science and not personal mythology, it must be said that there really is no cure for a hangover in the same sense that penicillin is a cure for an infection. There are several things, however, that you can put into your body to ease the pain and assist rapid recovery, including a little-known substance called cysteine. Cysteine directly counteracts the poisonous effects of acetaldehyde. The following arsenal-in-a-milkshake is so loaded with the anti-toxic munitions your body needs, that after it makes short work of your hangover, it might just clear out your nasal passages, shrink your hemorrhoids, and leap out of your body and write your History term paper. Behold the official SoYouWanna.com Almighty Hangover Emergency Cure (patent pending):
- 1. Take 2 aspirins
2. Take 200mg cysteine (available at specialty food stores)
3. Take 600mg vitamin C
4. Take 1 tablet vitamin B-complex
5. Mix the following ingredients together in a blender:
- 1 banana
- 1 small can V-8
- 6 large strawberries
- 2 tablespoons honey
- 1 cup orange juice
- 1-2 cups milk (or soy milk), to desired consistency
- ¼ tsp. salt
- dash of nutmeg
For a headache that drugs don't seem to touch, try an icepack or a bag of frozen peas wrapped in a tea towel, 20 minutes on your head, 10 minutes off. There've been lots of hangover remedies over the centuries, from the Assyrian crushed swallows' beaks with myrrh to Rabbit Dropping Tea (though we think that it tastes a little raisin-y). Friends of ours have suggested everything from club soda to the classic Bull's Eye (OJ and a raw egg) to pickle brine straight from the pickle jar. But if you're looking for something substantial that actually prevents vomiting, invest in the necessary pills and keep your blender handy; the Almighty Hangover Emergency Cure, judiciously combined with the wise drinking practices detailed above, is for you.
Cheers!
The Ultimate Queso
The Ultimate Queso recipe is one of my own creations. It is pretty simple and I use only the highest quality ingredients.
- Ingredients:
1 lb block of Velveeta Cheese
.5 - 1 cup of Milk
1 - 2 cups of the Ultimate Salsa
1 Buttload of quality dipping style Tortilla Chips
Preparation:
Cut Velveeta Cheese into small cubes. Place cheese into a double boiler or crock pot. Place heat on medium and slow cook until melted. Add milk and hand blend. Add the Ultimate Salsa mix and blend until all ingredients are thoroughly incorporated. Add additional milk as needed until desired thickness is achieved.
Presentation:
Pour Queso mixture into medium sized bowl. Dip tortilla chips into Ultimate Queso and insert into mouth. [You're dripping that stuff all over the place]
Variations:
Chili con Queso: add spicy, browned, ground-beef (85-15 minimum) to taste.
The Bartender says: Make sure you have a large towel available to wipe your mouth and chin and shirt and chair.
Cheers!
The Ultimate Cocktail Recipe
What is your favorite cocktail recipe?
I have been posting The Ultimate Recipes here this week and will continue to post them for the next couple of weeks for both food & beverages.
Venomous Kate sent me an improvement on a variation one of my Ultimate Martini recipes, the Dirty Martini. I decided to rename that particular variation of the drink after her - The Venomous Martini!
Then, SilverBlue sent me a really cool recipe of his favorite drink. It had a neat name and concept too, but somehow we'll have to name it the SilverBlue Cocktail.
So, I wanted to have a contest and here it is.
The Ultimate Blogger Cocktail Recipe Contest:
- Contest is open to anyone (prefer you to have a blog - but will consider all entries).
- You may enter as many times as you wish.
- Send me your favorite cocktail recipe (either in comments or e-mail me)
- Give it a name relating to your blog.
- All recipes posted on Friday, October 24.
- Style points for recipe originality.
- Style points for drink title originality.
- I will determine top 10 recipes.
- My decision for top 10 is final.
- I will post a Poll Host poll at the top of my blog for 1 week.
- Vote 1x per day till Thursday, October 30.
- Winner is entry with most votes posted on Poll Host by blog readers.
- Winner announced on Friday, October 31.
Winner will recieve a 1 liter bottle of your preferred liquor (within reason - don't be an asshole!).
I'll keep these instructions at the top of the page throughout the contest. Good Luck!
Cheers!
Update: Check the links under The Ultimate Blogger Recipes for all submissions to-date.
Bullshit so far »The Ultimate Salsa
The Ultimate Salsa recipe is from the Yucatan Liquor Stand in Oklahoma City (now closed). This is a 15 gallon quantity recipe, so you will have adjust proportions.
- Ingredients:
2 case #10 can - Heinz Garlic & Herb Diced Tomatoes
5 lbs fresh Jalepeno Peppers
1 case #10 can Hunts Tomato Juice
2 #10 cans Ketchup
5 lbs White Onions - diced
5-6 bunches of fresh Cilantro
1 cup Cracked Black Pepper
.5 cup Cumin
4 cups McCormicks California Style Garlic Salt
1 Buttload of quality dipping style Tortilla Chips
Preparation:
Pour diced tomatos, tomato juice, and ketchup into large mixing bowl. Add cracked black pepper, cumin, and garlic salt into mixture and mix thoroughly by hand. Cut stems off jalepeno peppers and discard. Chop jalepeno peppers and place into mixture. Dice onions and place into mixture. Finely chop cilantro and place into mixture. Mix all ingredients until well blended. Place in large covered bowl and refrigerate. Best served cold.
This will give you a Thick & Chunky Ultimate Salsa.
Variations:
Regular Ultimate Salsa: use a mechanical blender to dice onions and cilantro before adding to mixture. You can also increase the proportion of tomato juice and possibly add some Real Lemon to thin the mixture.
Extra Spicy Ultimate Salsa: subsitute a hotter pepper for jalepeno or add the hotter pepper to this recipe. Cayenne pepper can also be added to "kick it up a notch".
The Bartender says: I apologize for my lack of proper proportions. Actually, I thought I had lost this recipe years ago, but I found it in my book on HTML code! Bingo!
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »Hangover - Part IV
So you wanna cure a hangover? I found this article a few months ago, and want to share it with you, while giving the appropriate credit the anonymous author(s) at soyouwanna.com
This article has five different sections:
- 1. Understand what alcohol does to your body.
2. Prepare for the night out.
3. Know what to do while you're drinking.
4. Survive the morning after.
5. Quaff our ultimate hangover cure.
Survice The Morning After
You're alive. Give yourself a pat on the back. Sure, someone is trying to drive an iron spike into the back of your skull with a huge mallet, and what used to be mere colors and sounds are now interesting new species of pain, but you're still alive. You didn't choke on your own vomit. Small steps. Here's how to survive the rest of the morning:
Go back to bed. Is it a workday? Call in sick, call in sick, call in sick. You really are sick. Just ask your doctor. There are two ways of dealing with this fact:
Insane: "I was bad, so I deserve to feel like crap right now, and the only responsible thing to do is to drag my sorry carcass into work."
Sane: "Hello, _____ ? (insert boss's or even better, boss's secretary's name) Yeah, hi, it's ____. (insert your name) Listen, I think I might vomit, so I'm going to stay in bed for a while. Yeah, thanks. Bye."
Seriously, lie and call in that you have the stomach flu. No one will ask you about the details, and you'll sound awful anyway. Your body needs rest as it struggles to repair itself.
No more alcohol. The health-care pros generally believe that if, after a night of karaoke and greenish cocktails, you wake up all fuzzy-tongued and nauseous and that bottle of six-year-old crème de menthe on the night stand still looks good to you, you've got a problem. More booze the day after is just gonna make things worse.
Beware of coffee. Most of us blindly stretch out a shaky hand for the coffee cure-all based on the hypothesis that it usually wakes you up in the morning, so a cup of joe could do no harm. Those in the know, however, largely advise you to stay away from caffeinated beverages, since they are diuretic, and will aggravate dehydration. Opposing the kill-joys are those who tout coffee's headache-fighting power, and those who feel that denying a caffeine-addict his cup of Juan Valdez in times of greatest need constitutes cruel and unusual punishment. The decision is yours, but it's probably better just to take an aspirin instead.
Quaff our ultimate hangover cure: Coming tomorrow night
Cheers!
The Ultimate Margarita
"Basically, this is the concoction that created the Americanos' taste for tequila in the 1960's. Before this, tequila (which is technically a brandy) was best known in Central America and Mexico. Tax records in the Mexican town of Tequila note that 3 barrels of "mezcal wine" had been shipped to Texas in 1873, and American troop in pursuit of Pancho Villa had brought some back in 1916. Still, folks north of the border had not quite taken to the taste of tequila. Even when there was a shortage of gin during World War II, the gringo interest in tequila proved to be nothing more than a flirtation.
Then California college students discovered the Margarita, and the rest (as they say) is history. As for the creation of the drink itself, several bars and bartenders have staked a claim. The Caliente Racetrack in Tijuana boasts of its origin around 1930, as does Bertita's bar in Tasca, Mexico. Later claims have been insisted upon not only by the Garci Crespo Hotel in Puebla, Mexico, around 1936 (where the bartender says he named the drink for his girlfriend), but also by a couple from San Antonio, Texas, who spent many an hour wasting away during the 1950's at the bar of the Flamingo Hotel in Acapulco, where they owned a home. (Her name, of course, was Margarita.) And not to be denied a piece of the legend is an LA restaurant called The Tale of the Cock, where they claim to have created this recipe first during the Eisenhower Administration.
But the most documented story comes from Danny Herrera, who owned Rancho La Gloria between Rosarito Beach and Tijuana. In the late 1940's, a showgirl named Marjorie King stopped there often, and she had a drinking "problem" of sorts: she was allergic to every form of booze except tequila, which she needed mixed. Among the many tequila experiments that Danny Herrera tried was a concoction consisting of 3 parts white tequila, 2 parts Cointreau, and 1 part fresh lemon juice. These he shook together in a container of shaved ice, then served up in a short stemmed glass rimmed with lemon juice and salt. This she liked, and so he gave the drink the Spanish name for Marjorie: Margarita."
- Recipe:
1 1/2 oz. Cuervo Gold Tequila
3/4 oz. Cointreau
Splash of Sour Mix
Fresh sqeezed lime juice
Lime wedge
Lime wheel
Preparation:
Prepare salted rim glass (see below) before mixing cocktail. Pour ingredients into mixing glass over ice. Shake vigorously for several seconds - you should have a frothy mix when complete. Pour with ice (on the rocks) into salted rim glass or strain and serve (straight up) in salted rim glass.
Presentation:
Moisten rim of tall stemmed glass. The best way to do this is to wet a sponge and push the rim of the glass onto the surface of the sponge. Dip rim of glass into a pile of Kosher salt. You should have a thick line of salt on the rim. Your mixture should be filled up to right below the salted rim. Sqeeze lime wedge into drink and throw rind away. Garnish with lime wheel.
Variations:
Add more sweet-n-sour mix and blend with ice for a Frozen Margarita. Pour into tall, stemmed, salt rimmed glass. Garnish with lime wheel and insert milk straw.
Add completed Frozen Margarita to Frozen Strawberry Dacquiri for a Frozen Strawberry Margarita. Note: For the ultimate presentation of FSM alternate pouring Frozen Strawberry Dacquiri then Frozen Margarita into tall stemmed sugar rimmed glass giving you a layered or swirled appearance. Garnish with large strawberry, lime wheel, and insert milk straw.
Cheers!
Hangover - Part III
So you wanna cure a hangover? I found this article a few months ago, and want to share it with you, while giving the appropriate credit the anonymous author(s) at soyouwanna.com
This article has five different sections:
- 1. Understand what alcohol does to your body.
2. Prepare for the night out.
3. Know what to do while you're drinking.
4. Survive the morning after.
5. Quaff our ultimate hangover cure.
Know What To Do While You're Drinking
While you're out
OK, so you've loaded up on food and water. Now you can start your drinking. But while you're deciding whether you'd like a fuzzy navel or a Shirley Temple, there are a few things you can do while you're drinking to lessen the effects of the alcohol:
Choose your booze with care. There are poisons besides alcohol itself that contribute to a brutal hangover. Nasty chemicals called congeners occur naturally in all fermented drinks. The general rule is that darker drinks, such as red wine, bourbon, scotch, and brandy have more congeners than lighter drinks like white wine, vodka, and gin. But you should also keep in mind that whatever your drink's color, the cheaper it is, the more poison will be in it. So avoid the cheap sauce. One further note: red wine contains an extra hangover-inducing poison all of its own called tyramine. So be especially careful with cheap red wine.
Alternate alcoholic beverages with non-alcoholic beverages. This simple measure will help keep you hydrated. A fruit juice (which is particularly good at re-hydrating the body) is an especially good choice. If you're afraid that it'll make you look like a loser to be without an alcoholic drink, then lie and tell your friends it's a screwdriver. They'll probably be too drunk to notice that it's not.
Consume less than one drink per hour. Your liver breaks down alcohol at the rate of about a beer an hour, so spreading out the drinking over the course of an evening will lessen the likelihood of a hangover.
When you get home
Okay, you've had your fun, and staggered home-maybe threw up in the cab and forgot to leave a tip. Nothing to do now but attempt to remove any over-clothing or groupies that may have adhered to you and pass out within ten feet of the bed. Suddenly, your thoughts veer round like an oil tanker to the sobering realization that you've wrecked your poor body, and will surely pay for it in the morning. What can you do?
Have a pee. That'll save you at least one nocturnal trip to the bathroom.
Drain the contents of a very large, very full glass of water. Then refill, and drink some more. This will be surprisingly unpleasant, but must be done. If you prefer, drink some orange juice or Gatorade. The thing is, you need electrolytes, which will keep you hydrated.
Finally, remember that you shouldn't take analgesics (that is, headache medicine) of any kind at this stage. Some folks pop pills as a preventative, even though the inevitable headache hasn't yet arrived. This isn't a good idea. Aspirin upsets the stomach and aggravates the symptoms of a hangover. Acetaminophen (Tylenol), when mixed with the alcohol still in your bloodstream, might cause your liver to explode (best to avoid). If you want to take a pill, a multivitamin might help by replenishing some of the B vitamins you've pissed away during the course of the evening. Besides that, just drink lots of water, and rest easy in the knowledge that you have already pre-prepared one of our patented Almighty Hangover Emergency Cures and that it will be waiting for you in the morning.
IMPORTANT NOTE: See a doctor IMMEDIATELY if you are experiencing tremors, stomach pain, or if you see blood in your vomit. These are indications that you have tippled way too much, and must get professional medical attention, (e.g., a stomach-pump at the local emergency room). Better safe than sorry.
Survive the morning after: Coming tomorrow night.
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »The Ultimate Martini
[ed. I just wanted to update my Martini recipe from an earlier post and make it more complete.]
... As the Martini matured in popularity, its paternity was contested, giving rise to a second theory. Call this The Martinez Story. Citizens of Martinez, California, claimed that around 1870 a miner from San Francisco stopped his horse at Julio Richelieu's saloon on Ferry Street in Martinez for a bottle of whiskey. Richelieu was a young Frenchman who had come up from to Contra Costa County from New Orleans. The miner plunked a tobacco sack of gold nuggets on the bar near the weigh-scales and handed Richelieu a bottle. The bartender filled the container with whiskey from a large barrel, but the traveler said he wasn't quite satisfied. To make up the difference, Richelieu picked up a glass, mixed him a small drink, and dropped an olive in it. "What is it?" asked the miner. "That," replied Richelieu, "is a Martinez cocktail."
Richelieu left Martinez to operate barrooms in San Francisco, his last saloon being Lotta's Fountain on the corner of Kearny and Market. Richelieu served a Free Lunch and a number of gourmet cocktails, but the Martinez was his specialty in the 1880s. Although Richelieu didn't stake his claim with a bar manual, the town of Martinez still insists that it is the Birthplace of the Martini; in 1992, a zealous group installed a brass plaque on the corner of Alhambra and Masonic to declare this "fact."
Recipe:
Two ounces of premium brand Vokda / Gin.
Splash of Dry Vermouth.
Preparation:
Do not pour the vermouth over ice.
Chill the Martini glass by submerging glass into crushed ice.
Chill vodka over ice in mixing glass.
Pour chilled water / ice from Martini glass and quickly dry inside of glass.
Pour vermouth into Martini glass, swirl, pour out, shake remainer of vermouth from glass.
Strain vokda into stemmed Martini glass.
Presentation:
Spear three small stuffed olives and drop in glass to marinate.
When drinking a Martini, take a bit out of olive and a sip of Martini, chew, swirl, swallow.
Variations:
Dry Martini - delete verymouth and rub lemon twist, skin side out, around rim of glass.
Dirty Martini - add olive juice into chilling mixture, garnish blue Bleu Cheese stuffed olives.
Tequini - delete Vodka / Gin and substitute premium Gold Tequila, garnish with lime wheel.
Gibson - delete cocktail olives and substitute a spear of three cocktail onions.
Shaken or Stirred?
It's your decision, I like mine very cold, so shake it!
Update: The Dirty Martini will heretofore be known as The Venomous Martini.
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »Hangover - Part II
>So you wanna cure a hangover? I found this article a few months ago, and want to share it with you, while giving the appropriate credit the anonymous author(s) at soyouwanna.com
This article has five different sections:
1. Understand what alcohol does to your body.
2. Prepare for the night out.
3. Know what to do while you're drinking.
4. Survive the morning after.
5. Quaff our ultimate hangover cure.
Prepare For The Night Out
So now that you know exactly how alcohol can affect your little ol' body and what makes you likely to feel the aftereffects, it is time to figure out how to prevent and cure a hangover. By way of precaution, we recommend you prepare yourself even before you step out the door, by following these tips:
Don't go out on an empty stomach. Granted, it's completely unrealistic to ask you to pause and enjoy a healthy meal full of starches and stocked with essential minerals when you're getting ready to have a night on the town. But you should consider taking a preventative dose of the hangover cure you'll find at the end of this article. Also, launch your night at the pub with a double order of curly fries. The moderating effect this will have on the absorption of alcohol into your bloodstream in the short term may be more important than the clogged arteries in the long term. The reason that food is so important is because it'll sop up the alcohol so that it doesn't all go directly into the bloodstream.
Hydrate your body. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Sure, you'll probably still wake up at 4 a.m. with hairbrush tongue and a desperate compulsion to hang your head under the faucet, but every glass of juice or water you force yourself to swallow now is worth two in the morning. Everyone knows that alcohol acts as a diuretic. In case those long hours at the urinal didn't tip you off, more is going out than coming in. You need to replace that liquid.
Pre-prepare an Almighty Hangover Emergency Cure. Unless you're certain you'll be capable of operating a blender in the morning, you might want to be kind to your future (potentially hungover) self and prepare one of these miraculous little cures. You'll thank your past self the next morning, when you're in a cold sweat, crawling slowly toward the fridge.
So the lowdown is: eat, drink (water), and you'll be merry in the morning.
Know what to do while you’re drinking: Coming tomorrow night.
Cheers!
The Ultimate Bloody Mary
Today's recipe from the The Professional Mixologist Recipe Guide is The Bartender's very own creation and damn near as good as The Ultimate Martini.
This drink hails from Harry's New York Bar in Paris, and was first mixed by "Pete" Petoit. When Pete came back to New York City in the 1930's, he introduced the Red Snapper as America's first Bloody Mary. It was made with Gin, as Vodka was just emerging as a new spirit to American palates. The name may be attributed to Mary Tudor, the daughter of Henry VIII, who was declared illegitimate when Henry divorced her mother in 1532 to marry Anne Boleyn. She had a brief five year tenure as Queen and managed to kill off most of her Protestant adversaries. She was known as "Bloody Mary". Another account is that a patron said it reminded him of a girl named Mary he knew at the Bucket of Blood Club in Chicago. [Follow the link for a good picture of final product]
- Ingredients:
1 1/4 oz. Vodka
Worchestershire Sauce - splash or to taste
Tabasco Sauce - splash or to taste
Real Lemon Juice - splash or to taste
Celery Salt - pinch or to taste
Cracked Pepper - pinch or to taste
Kosher salt
Tomato juice
Preparation:
Pour Vodka, Worchestershire sauce, Real Lemon juice, celery salt, cracked pepper, and tomato juice over ice in a mixing glass. Shake mixture enough to consolidate ingredients.
Presentation:
Salted rim glass
Stalk of celery - must have small amount of leaves on stalk
Lime wheel
Lime wedge - 1/8 small lime
Moisten rim of tall glass. The best way to do this is to wet a sponge and push the rim of the glass onto the surface of the sponge. Dip rim of glass into a pile of Kosher salt. You should have a thick line of salt on the rim. Pour consolidated mixture from mixing glass into beverage glass, leaving enough room to place celery stalk into glass. Take a slice of lime and slit from center out. Place on rim of glass. Squeeze lime wedge onto top of Bloody Mary and discard skin. Your mixture should be filled up to right below the salted rim.
The Bartender says: I used to make this recipe in 5 Gallon quantities, so I'm not sure of the exact quantities for single or multiple cocktails. Just season to taste. Use the thickest tomato juice possible. I used to like Hunts but cannot find it anymore; just don't use the thin, runny stuff. Make sure to use Kosher salt - it has bigger crystals and looks better on the glass.
This recipe is damn near as good as The Ultimate Martini! I do guarantee you the Best Bloody Mary you have ever seen or tasted!
Cheers!
Shaken Not Stirred
"Shaken, not stirred" - James Bond 007
Can you really ‘bruise’ a spirit?
James Bond asks for his Vodka Martini shaken not stirred, but what difference does it make?
Drinking has many myths and sayings but one common debate revolves around the two questions posed above. Let’s start with the facts. No, you cannot ‘bruise’ a spirit by shaking it. This is most commonly applied to Gin, but is really a meaningless, though quaint phrase. What it may be trying to describe is the different effect shaking rather than stirring has on a Vodka or Gin Martini’s interaction with the ice. Shaking will provide the Martini with a greater amount of exposure to the ice thus chilling the drink more quickly. Stirring on the other hand is not as vigorous and is therefore a less swift way of achieving the same cold temperature. In addition, differing amounts of water will dilute the drink depending on how long it has been shaken or stirred with ice. If preparation time is a serious issue then this might make a shaken Martini the best choice. Well done, Mr. Bond!
However, there is another factor that should be considered. Shaking your Martini may have a serious drawback. The crystalline clarity that makes a Martini look so clean, crisp and sophisticated is lost. The shaking motion inundates the cocktail with many tiny bubbles, often producing undesirable cloudiness. What this means is a trade off between speed of preparation and appearance. Maybe we should be surprised that the stylish and sophisticated 007 would risk getting a cloudy Vodka Martini!
Cheers!
The Ultimate Martini
... As the Martini matured in popularity, its paternity was contested, giving rise to a second theory. Call this The Martinez Story. Citizens of Martinez, California, claimed that around 1870 a miner from San Francisco stopped his horse at Julio Richelieu's saloon on Ferry Street in Martinez for a bottle of whiskey. Richelieu was a young Frenchman who had come up from to Contra Costa County from New Orleans. The miner plunked a tobacco sack of gold nuggets on the bar near the weigh-scales and handed Richelieu a bottle. The bartender filled the container with whiskey from a large barrel, but the traveler said he wasn't quite satisfied. To make up the difference, Richelieu picked up a glass, mixed him a small drink, and dropped an olive in it. "What is it?" asked the miner. "That," replied Richelieu, "is a Martinez cocktail."
Richelieu left Martinez to operate barrooms in San Francisco, his last saloon being Lotta's Fountain on the corner of Kearny and Market. Richelieu served a Free Lunch and a number of gourmet cocktails, but the Martinez was his specialty in the 1880s. Although Richelieu didn't stake his claim with a bar manual, the town of Martinez still insists that it is the Birthplace of the Martini; in 1992, a zealous group installed a brass plaque on the corner of Alhambra and Masonic to declare this "fact."
Recipe:
Two ounces of premium brand Vokda / Gin.
Splash of Dry Vermouth.
Preparation:
Do not pour the vermouth over ice.
Chill the Martini glass by submerging glass into crushed ice.
Chill vodka over ice in mixing glass.
Pour chilled water / ice from Martini glass and quickly dry inside of glass.
Pour vermouth into Martini glass, swirl, pour out, shake remainer of vermouth from glass.
Strain vokda into stemmed Martini glass.
Presentation:
Spear three small stuffed olives and drop in glass to marinate.
When drinking a Martini, take a bit out of olive and a sip of Martini, chew, swirl, swallow.
Variations:
Dry Martini - delete verymouth and rub lemon twist, skin side out, around rim of glass.
Dirty Martini - add olive juice into chilling mixture, garnish blue Bleu Cheese stuffed olives.
Tequini - delete Vodka / Gin and substitute premium Gold Tequila, garnish with lime wheel.
Gibson - delete cocktail olives and substitute a spear of three cocktail onions.
Shaken or Stirred?
It's your decision, I like mine very cold, so shake it!
Update: The Dirty Martini will heretofore be known as The Venomous Martini.
Cheers!
» Snooze Button Dreams links with: The Bestofme Symphony, 1st edition
» Snooze Button Dreams links with: The Bestofme Symphony, 1st edition
Harvey Wallbanger
Today's recipe from the The Professional Mixologist Recipe Guide is the Harvey Wallbanger:
"This drink became popular in the 70's. I have two accounts both originating in California. One is that Bill Doner, while tending bar in a place named The Office in Newport Beach, created it. The other is that a surfer named Harvey liked his screwdrivers spiked with Galliano & after a hard day, had one too many & walked into a wall."
- Ingredients:
1 1/4 oz. Vodka
Orange juice
Splash of Galliano
Pour Vodka & Orange juice over ice in a tall or Collins glass.
Float Galliano over the top.
I give this drink a Thumbs Down! This is a drink for wienies!
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »
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Good Point. Anyways, this was where i met her. You can join for free as well www.redtricircle.com
click here bullshitted on March 12, 2005 at 03:21 AM