Emperor Misha I of The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler has redesigned the palace.
His highness has seen fit to include me, The Imperial Tender of Bars, in his
Below is the full and complete text of the Imperial Post:
Redesigning the PalaceI most humbly accept this important position and do solemnly swear to uphold the duties and expectations of the office, so help me G-d!It struck us, in our infinite wisdom, that it was about time that we got around to linking the Imperial Tender of Bars, so we did. Recognizing that the services of such a person are vital to the continued assault on His Majesty's liver, we furthermore decided to stick his link in the Council so that we won't have to hunt around for it when we need to issue a fresh challenge to our Imperial Ethanol Dehydrogenase (gotta make that damn enzyme earn its keep, dammit!)
So welcome, newly appointed Imperial Mixer of Poisons, and, once the applause has died down, go get his Imperial Booziness a drink!
Also, it struck us as unfair that the Imperial Armorer (and Keeper of the Arsenal of Doom, Death and Destruction™) was languishing below, so we yanked him further up on the food chain as well.
Besides, considering the Arsenal, it would seem prudent for us to keep a close eye on this one. You never know when your former loyal minions decide to get funny ideas, after all.