Madfish Willie's Costume Contest & Clusterfuck
[Originally posted November 1, 2003 - some links will not be current - too fuckin bad if that bother you]It was a dark and stormy night…Well, it was nighttime, and the rain was pouring down on our heads like a cow peeing on a flat rock. Lightning bolts blasting through the black night followed closely by the thunderous booms of the cracked sound barrier. It was a great night for a Halloween Party at Madfish Willie's. The whole gang was coming down - the Corner of the Bar Gang, the Corner of the Bar Babes, all the Munuvians and various other assorted fruitcakes, kooks, and freaks of nature. After all, the Madfish Willie's Halloween Party, Costume Contest, and Clusterfuck was the biggest party of the year - even bigger than New Years Eve.
Harvey and Blackfive were the first to arrive. I almost didn't recognise them, except I could always tell Harvey by his big ole clown feet. He wore the big red clown shoes all year round - and he was always tripping and falling down and shit. Harvey was dressed as the Scarecrow with straw coming out of his shirt sleeves and pant legs a hollowed out pumpkin on his head. [He really needs a heart, too]
"Dam, Harvey doesnt that smell like shit after a while?" Blackfive asked.
"No, I'm used to the smell - I am a Sanitation Engineer ya know," Harvey mumbled back.
Blackfive was a Rodeo Clown. The whole clown face thing and a polka dot long sleeved shirt, and blue long johns under a pair of big old baggy knee length shorts, held up by red suspenders. He was wearing an old beat up crushed straw cowboy hat to top it off.
Next to arrive was Finn the Viking who was dressed as… you guessed it, a Viking Warrior. He was wearing one of those Viking helmets with the big horns sticking out the sides like you see at the football games. Long, flowing blonde hair and carrying a giant norse broadsword. Heavy animal skins draped his massive shoulders. He was accompanied by his beautiful and scantily clad red-haired wench, Linda.
Following them into the party were a bunch of bloggers in their great, costumed characters:
Susie - An old time Barmaid with short skirt, fishnet stockings, and a frilly low, low-cut blouse;
Helen - I Dream of Jeanie with the veil and that sexy little see through jeanie outfit;
Kate - Playboy Bunny with the bunny ears and those big hooters not quite completely stuffed into the push up thingy they wear and poking everybody in the eye who walked by
Serenity - Lela from Futurama with one big eye in the middle (I don’t how she saw where the hell she was going all night), black boots, and wrist thingy she kept hitting everyone with;
Dana, America's #1 Pin up Girl - Ginger in her slinky form-fitting, silk floor-length formal dress;
Heather - Mary Ann in a pair of short, short, short cut off jeans and half shirt tied at the… well… the boobs and just barely keeping them from popping right out;
Candy - A Mermaid with long golden curls, itty bitty shiny green bikini top with her boobies popping out, and long green fish tail;
Jennifer - Dr Beverly Crusher from Star Trek TNG in a skin-tight, form-fitting, blue, one-piece uniform;
Emporer Misha I - Master of His Domain, complete with his two snarling, slobbering, rottweilers - Geri and Freki
Frank J - came as a Fucking Hippy with tie-died shirt with a peace sign on the front, matching head scarf, tattered dirty jeans with holes in the ass and half torn off patches on the knees, dark aviator sunglasses and a goddamn white daisy flower in his filthy fucking hair – and boy did he stink!;
SilverBlue - the Red Skelton Hobo with really heavy make-up – he maybe went a little overboard on that - but he smelled like booze and vomit, real nasty, and had bags under his bloodshot eyes;
Lord Spatula I - Bad Ass Biker Dude in boots, chains, no shirt, black leather vest and chaps, or maybe he was some type of S&M guy, who knows;
Ted - Rocket Jones, the scientist extraordinaire with pocket protector, black horn-rims with the bridge taped together with adhesive tape, calculator, slide rule and everything ;
Victor - Gilligan… yes, that Gilligan with the goofy hat and the dumb-ass faux sailor outfit - damn, Victor is a natural spittin image of Gilligan ;
Pixy Misa - Captain Jon-Luc Picard, in complete control of all he surveys;
Jim - Wild Thing from Major League - damn if he didn’t look exactly like him too, right down to the jagged haircut in the back, the big black horn rimmed glasses and Cleveland Indians uniform
Don - Long John Silver, the Pirate, although he kept trying to convince Helen he was Long Dong Silver, the porn star.
Tom - Norton from the Jackie Gleason show with the white t-shirt, vest and stupid looking hat;
Mookie - Raggedy Andy with red mop-haired wig, freckles and red and white checkered outfit;
Daniel - Data with silver face paint and no emotion chip (he wasn’t any fun - too rigid)
Simon - Frank N Stein, with big black shoes with 3” soles, flat head, ugly face, scare on forehead and bolts sticking out his neck. Then he put his costume on.;
Tuning Spork - He didn’t have a name for his costume. He wore what looked like a commode made of Styrofoam with the lid up. It had the tank on the back, with a roll of toilet paper on a roller on the side of the tank, a vase of flowers and a newspaper on the top of the tank with his head sticking out the center of the bowl! We didn’t know what to call him, so we named him Shithead!
Stevie - Father Guido Sarducci with black robe, white priest collar, across hanging from his neck and a black short-brimmed hat. And a King James Version Holy Bible.
Cherry - French Maid with short black skirt, black blouse with plunging, and I do mean plunging neckline and little white apron, thigh high black hose with the line up the back and 4” black come fuck me pumps;
LeAnn - Cheesehead, a Green Bay Packers fan, complete with a Brett Favre jersey and the cheese block hat;
Tiger - Cowboy Gorilla, big hairy suit (or was the big hairy dude just naked?), red bandana, white cowboy hat and longneck beer;
Tim - Crash Test Dummy wearing a flesh colored sweat suit with a double set of tire tracks running up the front, around the side and down the back;
Straight White Guy - Locutus of Borg and who spent the whole night trying to catch Picard and beat the shit out of assimilate him;
Doc Russia - Dr Bashir with genetically engineered genius IQ wearing the blue operating smock and facemask with a stethoscope draped around his neck;
Well we were partying our ass off and drinking way too much, especially Blackfive who keeps ordering 6 beers at a time. Damn, how the fuck can he keep drinking like that and still stand up? Lots o’ practice… I guess.
About midnight, we ran our costume contest. We turned up the house lights, and turned off the house music. Everyone in costume gets on the dance floor and walks around in a circle while the judges select the best contestants for a yell-off to determine the winner of the $500.00 cash prize! We play all the cool Halloween tunes like Monster Mash, Thriller, and the rest of kind of crap. Then, we picked what we thought were the best costumes and actors playing the part.
The judges picking the Best Costumes were Harvey, Blackfive, Misha (because nobody's gonna give him any shit if they don't like our choices), and me, Madfsih Willie (shit I goota learnd how spill me name wright).
Our finalists were: Finn the Viking and wench, Helen as I Dream of Jeanie, Cherry as French Maid, Straight White Guy as Locutus of Borg, Jim as Wild Thing, and Tuning Spork as Shithead.
We cleared the dance floor of the other contestants and bought them each a beer. Then as we called each finalist out the crowd cheered for their favorite costume. Each blogger stepped forward to thunderous appluse and great shouting. When each contestant stepped forward, the cheers just got louder and louder. Back and forth and back and forth.
It was such a close vote that we couldn't decide! And we gotta give the prizes away! What to do?
I'm gonna give you the chance to tell me who should win the costume contest. Vote in the comments until Monday night. Tuesday morning we'll announce the winner!
Bullshit so far »
The Life & Times of Madfish Willie
I was boarding an airplane the other day and finally made it past all the rest of the idiots to my seat. As I settled in, I glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. I soon realized that she is headed straight toward my seat. A wave of nervous anticipation washed over me.
Low and behold, she takes the seat right beside mine. Anxious to strike up a conversation, I blurt out, "So where are you flying to today?" She turns and smiles and says, "To the annual Nymphomaniac Convention in Chicago."
Whoa! I swallowed hard and was instantly CRAZED with excitement. Here's the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen, sitting right next to me, and she's going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs!
Struggling to maintain my outward cool, I calmly asked, "And what's your role at this convention?" She flips her long hair back, turns to me, looks into my eyes, and says, "Well, I try to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."
"Really", I said, swallowing hard, again. "And what myths are those?" She explains: "Well, one popular myth is that African American men are the most well-endowed, when, in fact, it is the Native American who is most likely to possess this trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who romance women best, on average."
"Very interesting" I responded. Suddenly, the woman becomes very embarrassed, and blushes. "I'm sorry," she says, "I feel so awkward discussing this with you, and I don't even know your name." I extended my hand and replied, "Tonto, Tonto Goldstein."
Bullshit so far »Life & Times of Madfish Willie
Eric rolls into Madfish Willie's last night, but Madfish Willie refused to serve him. "You've had too much to drink," he said. "I'm not serving you." Five minutes later, Eric came in again. Madfish stood firm. "There's no way I'm serving you more alcohol. You've had more than enough already." Five minutes later, the doors opened and Eric lurched in once more. "Look," said Madfish, "I'm not serving you. You're too drunk." Eric nodded. "I guess I must be, " he said. "The last two places said the same thing."
Bullshit so far »Life & Times of Madfish Willie
Madfish Willie discovered a wild dog in an icy cave during an important business meeting because his head hurt and banged his head on a wall which caused an avalanche, he stole a car and as if it were a miracle he escaped narrowly and hitch-hiked all the way home.
Bullshit so far »Life & Times of Madfish Willie
Madfish Willie was friends with an axe murderer after winning the lottery and got 2nd degree burns because he had no sleep the night before and fell violently ill. Madfish Willie just dodged three bullets, he blew up a truck with a hand grenade and while wearing his lucky backpack he got promoted to field marshal.
Bullshit so far »The Story of Madfish
Everybody's been screaming for more info on the Madfish, where he came from, what he's done. So here are a few of my smaller adventures across the globe that I dug out of my diary. I didn't take very good notes on most of these adventures so the details are severaly lacking but you get the picture.
Madfish Willie fought his enemy: Fat Bastard on an ironing board during the third world war in a sad mood and fell violently ill so everyone bowed down to Madfish Willie, he grabbed the detonator and as if it were a miracle he killed the bad guy and made it away with minimal injuries.
Madfish Willie saw a movie made by Fat Bastard in Japan and got locked in prison because his leg hurt and chased a bunny. Madfish Willie then escaped through a secret passage, he called the police and with his last ounce of strength he escaped narrowly and hitch-hiked all the way home.Last Call »
Bullshit so far »
Beer Fart
One particular night a couple of years ago while Eric, one of Corner of the Bar Gang, was going to college, he'd been out on a big drunk at Madfish Willie's and we didn't get him to his house until after the bar closed.
He had an early class the next day - a lab to be precise. He managed to drag his sorry ass out of bed and just barely made it to class on time.
The lab he was in that day had wooden seats and was very uncomfortable. Halfway through the lab Eric started nodding out, chin bouncing off his chest as he drifted in and out of consciousness. He finally laid his head down on the desk in front of him, drool running out the side of his mouth and puddling on the desk as he drifted off into sleepyland.
All of a sudden he awoke to the sound of an explosive fart. He looked around and started laughing along with everybody else. Then he realized everybody was looking at him and laughing.
Eric was the one that farted while he was asleep and he woke himself up.
What a dumb-ass! I guess that taught him to stay home and study instead of out galavanting around when he had school the next day!
~Madfish
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The Trouble With Thor
A crowd of us were down to this club late one night - all plastered. This particular place stayed open later than the others because it passed itself off as a restaurant. If you ordered a drink you had to order something to eat. So I had my slice of pizza and beer, trying to hold on to both of them at the same time and I started talking to this guy I bumped into. He was about 6" 6' and not far from 300 pounds of solid muscle. He must have been mental too because he was showing me his hands and telling me he'd killed people before and that he was Finn the Viking in another life. Leave it to me to find people like this. While he was telling me all this, the topping slide off my pizza and stuck to the leg of his pants. So I threw the beer back and got the fuck out of there before I became his next victim. I saw him later that night down at Madfish Willie's. He recognized me from the restaurant and walked towards me. Oh, shit! I'm gonna die right here, right now. I looked for some help to deal with this walking mountain of a man. "OK," I said to the Corner of The Bar Gang, "you hit him high, I'll hit him low, and we'll dogpile him so he doesn't kill everybody before we can get the cops." As he drew closer, me heart was pounding through my chest and the adrenaline starting coursing through my veins. I thought for sure the end was near. He was right up on me. But instead of beating me to a bloody pulp, he streched his hand out in friendship. "Dude, I'm Finn the Viking, why did you run off like that? I was gonna buy you another slice of pizza for accidentally knocking that piece out of your hand." To my, and the Corner of The Bar Gang's relief, we have been lifelong buddies ever since. Bullshit so far »
The Adventures of Madfish Willie
The Big No-Sleep
A good drinking buddy, Blackfive, and I were in Madfish Willie's having some drinks on a Thursday night after work. We proceeded to get smashed and at the end of the night we decided to see how many days we could stay loaded AND awake. (I wouldn't recommend anyone trying this as it has its consequences, especially for the inexperienced drinker.) Anyway, we went to Susie's house after Madfish Willie's closed and drank all night long.
Blackfive and I were back at Madfish Willie's when it opened Friday morning. We were still very loaded, but awake. We stayed in Madfish Willie's drinking all day Friday and Friday Night till it closed up. I think someone gave us a bunch of really strong caffeine pills and we sort of "drank ourselves sober" at some point." We got a couple of twelve packs of beer 'to go' when we left Madfish Willie's Friday night for insurance.
We were STILL de termined not to "give up" on our Quest. I think by that time we thought we were on the verge of setting some sort of record.
Last Call »Bullshit so far »
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Madfish Willie's Costume Contest & Clusterfuck
It was a dark and stormy night…Well, it was nighttime, and the rain was pouring down on our heads like a cow peeing on a flat rock. Lightning bolts blasting through the black night followed closely by the thunderous booms of the cracked sound barrier. It was a great night for a Halloween Party at Madfish Willie's. The whole gang was coming down - the Corner of the Bar Gang, the Corner of the Bar Babes, all the Munuvians and various other assorted fruitcakes, kooks, and freaks of nature. After all, the Madfish Willie's Halloween Party, Costume Contest, and Clusterfuck was the biggest party of the year - even bigger than New Years Eve.
Harvey and Blackfive were the first to arrive. I almost didn't recognise them, except I could always tell Harvey by his big ole clown feet. He wore the big red clown shoes all year round - and he was always tripping and falling down and shit. Harvey was dressed as the Scarecrow with straw coming out of his shirt sleeves and pant legs a hollowed out pumpkin on his head. [He really needs a heart, too]
"Dam, Harvey doesnt that smell like shit after a while?" Blackfive asked.
"No, I'm used to the smell - I am a Sanitation Engineer ya know," Harvey mumbled back.
Blackfive was a Rodeo Clown. The whole clown face thing and a polka dot long sleeved shirt, and blue long johns under a pair of big old baggy knee length shorts, held up by red suspenders. He was wearing an old beat up crushed straw cowboy hat to top it off.
Next to arrive was Finn the Viking who was dressed as… you guessed it, a Viking Warrior. He was wearing one of those Viking helmets with the big horns sticking out the sides like you see at the football games. Long, flowing blonde hair and carrying a giant norse broadsword. Heavy animal skins draped his massive shoulders. He was accompanied by his beautiful and scantily clad red-haired wench, Linda.
Following them into the party were a bunch of bloggers in their great, costumed characters:
Bullshit so far »
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Mr Shit Head
An extremely modest man, Frank J, was in the hospital for series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.
Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, Frank J decided the latest episode was another and stayed put. Frank J suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.
In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.
A drunken idiot, Harvey, was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. Harvey started yelling, cursing, and swinging his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with half the shitty sheets in a tangled pile at his feet, the other half wrapped around his big old head.
As Harvey stood there, unsteady on his feet, scratching his ass and staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard, Blackfive, who was barely containing his laughter and had watched the whole incident, walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here? "
Harvey, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the shit out of a ghost. "
[ Happy Halloween ]
Joke provided by Candy Universe and Cragerized by Madfish Willie!
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The Adventures of Madfish Willie
The Romantic Life of a Sailor
I'll start this story off like every other Navy sea story with the proverbial; "This is a no-shitter!"
My submarine pulled into Hong Kong back in '91 for a week and the first night we all headed out to a neat club called Madfish Willies. We had been underway [spanking the monkey] for about a month and were ready to get drunk and chase hot wild young good-looking women [Corner of the Bar Babes] - we have to live up to that submariner stereotype, don't we?
I got to the bar and edged in between two big hairy bastards and ordered six beers. I started talking with them and found out they were Viking Sailors. I only remember one of their names, Finn the Viking, because after he told me his name he turned his bottom lip out to show me the "Fuck You" tattoo. They were really plastered and after a few shots of B-52's they returned the favor and insisted on buying us Americans a drink. I never refuse a free one and before I knew it Finn the Viking leans over and yells to the barkeep, Linda: "Two shots of Johnny Walker Black!" I love J W Black and water but have to be really smashed to drink it straight. I have since then remedied that obstacle.
I protested to Finn the Viking but it didn't matter. The shot was shoved in my hand and he leaned over me and said "Drink it, Yank." Afraid of what would happen if I didn't I tossed it back. It got about 3/4 of the way down my esophagus before making a U-turn. I put my hand over my mouth but it was too late. I spewed the Johnny Black and some of my dinner across the bar and onto Linda who had returned with Finn the Viking's change. She cussed me and pointed to the bathroom. Finn the Viking picked my up by the collar, knocking my cowboy hat off in the process, and walked me the 10 feet to the shitter. He kicks open a stall door and shoves my head into the shitter. "Git to it, mate."
A little more came up and I was fine but embarrassed and pissed off since my last vomitous happened more than 2 years prior. I started to get up off the floor but Finn the Viking put his hand on my shoulder and pushed me back down. "You're not done yet, mate." I assured him I was but it didn't matter. Being a good shipmate, Finn the Viking pushes me to the side and says, "Here, we'll do it together." He shoves half his hand down his throat and after a few seconds of gagging and a sound I cannot even attempt to describe, he puked into the shitter.
I was so disgusted seeing our puke swirling around in that shitter that I lost it. What was left of my dinner came up in a matter of seconds. I was exhausted and couldn't keep from thinking about what just happened and I started to laugh. Finn the Viking tore off some shit paper and started to wipe my face off. He picked me up and we went back to the bar where my cold beer is now warm beer (with only two sips taken from it), and my hat, laying crushed to a pancake beside my barstool, waited for me. Linda gave me a dirty look and threw a bar rag in front of me and pointed to the puke on the counter. "Dammit, wipe that nastry crap up before you do another fucking thing." I wiped it up, thanked my new Viking friends, grabbed my crushed cowboy hat and my warm beer and went to the far side of the bar to start hitting on the Corner of the Bar Babes and Chinese girls with British accents.
Signed Matt O'Blackfive
[Ed Note: Blackfive wasn't in the Navy, but it's still a good dinking story]
Cheers
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The Adventures of Madfish Willie
Rock n Hurl
We, the Corner of the Bar Babes from Madfish Willie's, were on our merry way to this big concert. Dana, Susie, Candy and I were very excited so in order to relax we decided to drop by Madfish Willie’s to have a few beers.....Well a few beers turned into 2 cases between Dana, Susie, Linda, Kate, Serenity, LeAnn and I. By the time we had gotten to the parking lot to drive to the concert, we were pretty toasted. Harvey and Blackfive told us we shouldn’t be driving, but we held our ground. We loaded up in the panel bus, with Finn the Viking designated driving for us. Upon entrance to the concert to our dismay we learned that alcohol sales stopped at 9:30. Oh the inhumanity! Even worse the beers were near $6.00 each. But this did not stop our mission to get plastered. Since each vendor will only sell you 1 beer at a time we found some fast food drink holders and went around and got 8 beers each! On our way to our seats, Susie and Dana were stumbling and sloshing beers and being belligerent all around. Linda, Jennifer and Kate met some protestors (what they were protesting we will never know!) but Linda took their sign and tore it up, threw it on the ground, and stomped on it. "Goddam, hippy protesters!", she yelled at them. They started to give us a bunch of shit, but Finn the Viking came up behind us, and they ran away like a bunch of wimps. Then, we went to the show. To make a long story short, I drank all of my beer (I am a 120 lb female), passed out before the show was over and then started throwing up in public during the final act of Rage Against The Machine (quite gracefully I must add). Serenity almost went to detox because she was so wasted but managed to summon the strength to stagger past the cops to the bus, then passed out. Meanwhile, Finn the Viking was taking digital pics of everyone passed out and throwing up so he could post on the Madfish Willie’s web page...not cool.....I was konked out the whole way home and to this day have never lived this show down!!!
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »» Note-It Posts links with: In tribute...
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The Adventures of Madfish Willie
This story took place a few years ago when in was illegal to buy beer after 11 P.M. or on Sunday. So it was late one Sunday night and Harvey, Blackfive, Eric, Steve, Finn, the Viking and I were feeling a little thirsty. It was difficult to buy beer during off-hours but not impossible if you had the right connections - which they did. So we made the trip to a store which would sell us beer after hours, at nearly double the regular price, and they picked up a couple of dozen and went on home to watch some TV. The first beer Harvey opened seemed like the best beer he ever had. He drank it in a matter of seconds - and so did Blackfive - so did I. We all reached down for our second beer at the same time and chugged that one just as fast and thenwe had another and another. We were all looking at each other and grinning but trying to keep quiet about how fast we were drinking. This went on for about a half-hour or so without Eric, Steve and Finn, the Viking noticing. By the time they finished their third beer Harvey, Blackfive and I had the rest of the 2 dozen gone. At first they thought we hid the beer but then they saw we were half cut. We thought Finn, The Viking was gonna kill us all! He was cussin' and yellin' and raisin' all kinds of hell. Just as he was going for his mighty nordic killing sword, Steve and Eric tackled him and held him down until we could all pile on top. With a mighty heave, he threw us all off - just like one of those Popeye cartoons. Luckily, this made him too tired to kill us. Well, they were all pretty pissed at us but there's no use crying over chugged beer, so we went back to the store and got a few more cases. Harvey mad Blackfive buy cause he always tries to get out of paying at the bar. After we got back to Madfish Willie's, Harvey made some cheese sandwiches and everything was back to normal.
Cheers!
Bullshit so far »» Note-It Posts links with: In tribute...
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The Adventures of Madfish Willie
The other day, I was interviewing LeAnn. She's a pretty young thing from from The Cheese Stands Alone. She was applying for a barmaid position at Madfish Willie's. She looked familiar... I thought I had seen her somewhere before... but where? I asked her to tell me a little about herself and about her qualifications. So she goes into this little rant.
OK, I've made an idiot of myself here at Madfish Willies many times, but the last time takes the cake. A couple of weeks ago at a birthday party for Susie, my friend, we had more than enough to drink at the hall where the party was held. Nevertheless, Susie decided we should go to Madfish Willie's clubbing with the others. She insisted I join in the drinking competition. Of course, being female and having drunk too much already, I was unable to walk properly pretty quickly. I was carried out of the club by Lord Spatula, Sir John of Argghhh!!! and Finn, the Viking. They chucked us in a cab, where I got sick. The cab also cost me 25 bucks. When Susie got me got home, I couldn't find my house keys. So, she had to try to wake up my mom. It was 2:30am and we couldn't wake her up. So, Susie left me in the entryway, which is where I woke up the next morning with no memory of the night before. I missed two days of college - one cause I was still drunk and the next day cause thats when I got the mother of all hangovers!
There have also been times when I got so hot at a Madfish Willie parties that I took my shirt off. Well, if the guys can do it, so can I, was my thinking at the time. Then I realized I was flashing my boobs at everyone and someone had called the police. Eric and Serenity mad me put me shirt back on so I wouldn't get thrown in jail.
I've been greeted by cheers at work the mornings after Ive been out because of my adventures. To say I go a little wild would be fair. However, I would like to say I dont make a habit of getting completely hammered. The amount of times Ive been like that are few, honestly!
Well, after that little story, I finally remembered Harvey, Misha and Blackfive telling me some story about what happened on my day off.
So, what do you think? Should I hire a girl who takes her shirt off at parties and get shit-faced drunk at Madfish Willie's?
You tell me!
Cheers!
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Madfish Willie's Theme Song
How about some theme music for Madfish Willie's to play as the soundtrack behind all advertising we have to do?
D'oh-Re-Mi-Beer by Homer J Simpson
Actually, I think the song by Homer is Blackfive's alma mater fight song!
Update 1: I like the new Toby Keith / Willie Nelson song: Whiskey for my Men, Beer for my Horses!
Update 2: I have it - the theme song for Madfish Willie's
Cheers! Bullshit so far »Jimmy Buffet - God's Own Drunk
The Adventures of Madfish Willie
I was working the joint during an unsually busy Happy Hour Party last Friday. There was a disheveled, goofy guy at the end of the bar scribbling furiously with a teeny, tiny little pencil in a small, black blood-stained book.
He was leaning back in Frank J's chair, with his feet kicked up on Misha's seat. Who was this freak? How dare he come into our place, sit in Frank J's special reserved place and put his feet on any chair, much less Misha's? The Rott was growling furiously, foaming at the mouth and straining at the chain to get at this interloper. [I was dog sitting The Rott for a couple of hours while Misha was out running around.] He didn't like the idea of someone sitting in Misha's seat. He didn't like people putting their feet up on the chairs, either.
This didn't look good. I could tell from my many years of experience dealing with dumb-asses that something bad was about to happen. I checked under the bar, making sure the Imperial ClueBat was handy, then I walked over and asked him if he needed something to drink.
"What is your blending capacity in this establishment?", he inquired.
Last Call »Bullshit so far »
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Son of Monster Mash-Up: Tricks, Treats, and Dead Beats
http://audium.blogspot.com/2005/10/son-of-monster-mash-up-halloween-mash.html
Audiosports bullshitted on October 25, 2005 at 09:47 PM