The Trouble With Thor

How I Met Finn the Viking

A crowd of us were down to this club late one night - all plastered. This particular place stayed open later than the others because it passed itself off as a restaurant. If you ordered a drink you had to order something to eat. So I had my slice of pizza and beer, trying to hold on to both of them at the same time and I started talking to this guy I bumped into. He was about 6" 6' and not far from 300 pounds of solid muscle. He must have been mental too because he was showing me his hands and telling me he'd killed people before and that he was Finn the Viking in another life. Leave it to me to find people like this. While he was telling me all this, the topping slide off my pizza and stuck to the leg of his pants. So I threw the beer back and got the fuck out of there before I became his next victim. I saw him later that night down at Madfish Willie's. He recognized me from the restaurant and walked towards me. Oh, shit! I'm gonna die right here, right now. I looked for some help to deal with this walking mountain of a man. "OK," I said to the Corner of The Bar Gang, "you hit him high, I'll hit him low, and we'll dogpile him so he doesn't kill everybody before we can get the cops." As he drew closer, me heart was pounding through my chest and the adrenaline starting coursing through my veins. I thought for sure the end was near. He was right up on me. But instead of beating me to a bloody pulp, he streched his hand out in friendship. "Dude, I'm Finn the Viking, why did you run off like that? I was gonna buy you another slice of pizza for accidentally knocking that piece out of your hand." To my, and the Corner of The Bar Gang's relief, we have been lifelong buddies ever since.

ยป by Madfish Willie on November 5 :: Permalink :: Comments (13) :: Adventures of Madfish

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Now, I know I am not a member of the blogging community, but a little tip my way for the nomenclature, perhaps? Or at least gimme a nice blended frou-frou drink... or maybe a sloe gin fizz?

Posted by: Ethne on November 5, 2003 02:41 PM

No fucking frou-frou drinks! Vikings drink Grog and Ale1

Posted by: The Bartender on November 5, 2003 04:06 PM

Bartender, I'm buying for my girl Ethne, here. She and I have been longtime partners in...(insert legally questionable activity here)...and you just mix her whatever she likes. She knew me back when I was still called "Hooligan", AND she's the one who coined the term, "Finn the Viking". She's been with us through it all--our wedding, plotting playgrounds for our little girl with pirate ships and trebuchets...she sends us virtual cannoli, and she is ONE TOUGH CHICKIE.

Besides, I'll put the logo up on my site if you do...
Linda tries her sweetest smile.

What? Why is everybody running away? What? Come back! I just wanted to get loaded with my girlfrend, here!


Posted by: Linda on November 5, 2003 05:18 PM

Heya! I put the logo up!

I did! No, really!

Posted by: Linda on November 5, 2003 05:31 PM

OK Linda, just 'cause you say it's so... ONE nice blended frou-frou drink for Ethne. Plus I'll blogroll her under Non-Alcoholic Beer and do a post next week (you remind me about the post). Tell her to ger ready for a Willie-lanche, all three hits!

Posted by: The Bartender on November 5, 2003 05:46 PM

Mr. Bartender, you just rock. Thanks for setting up m'girl here.

Believe me, after the last coupla weeks--she needs it. Looking around to see if she's listening. How much will it cost me to make sure you put her under the table? ;->

Posted by: Linda on November 5, 2003 08:48 PM

Honey, not much... with lack o' sleep and little stress relief, and the fact that I am a lightweight, prolly one frou-frou drink should do it. ;)

Ah, screw it! Makes me a Margarita bar keep. Hey, it's a real drink, it has tequila. :D

(Thanks Hoolie for the fine endorsement.)

Posted by: Ethne on November 5, 2003 09:34 PM

Can I get a Daquiri? Preferably with an umbrella in it? Yummy.

Posted by: Finn the viking/Galstaff on November 6, 2003 09:57 AM

Yeah, put whatever the Viking wants on my tab. I got this round for ya, Finn! :D

Posted by: Ethne on November 6, 2003 10:58 AM

And for me, a double shot of Fire and Ice if you please. You got smokes for sale back there? I really, really want one.

Posted by: Linda on November 6, 2003 01:48 PM

Yeah, me too!

Posted by: Ethne on November 6, 2003 02:21 PM

Only have the crooked ones and they're at the house! Besides... smokin's bad... haven't you heard... fuck 'em... come on over and hotbox a couple before you have to go back to work!

Posted by: The Bartender on November 6, 2003 02:38 PM

Mr. Bartender, you da man! You do a shot with us, 'kay?

Posted by: Linda on November 6, 2003 05:22 PM