[Originally posted on October 8, 2003]
Wednesday Happy Hour
Moe's Toast...
"May you live as long as you like,
And have all you like as long as you live."
Bart's Prank Call[Bart with Lisa and Maggie]
Oliver Clothesoff! Call for Oliver Clothesoff!
[Marge picks up the extension and hears:]
Listen, you lousy bum, if I ever get a hold of you, I swear I'll cut your belly open!
Harvey finally comes across with some big cabbage for the Tip Jar. I was just fixin ta aks ya what the hell, dude, where's the beef? Now you're talking, daddio! [reaches up and pulls the high roller tip bell...repeatedly] Update: Some son-of-a-bitch came and swiped my $20 bill out of the Tip Jar. Friggin' rotten, thievin, bastards!
Stop looking at my TITS! Jim at Snooze Button Dreams has the answer to one of the mankind's deepest mysteries .
One burning question has lingered in the thoughts of women across the world since the very beginning of civilization. "Why the hell are guys like that?" Or more specifically, "Why can't I have a rational conversation with a guy without him looking at my boobs every five seconds or having his eyes glaze over as he strokes his mental stiffy with thoughts of me in a naughty French maid outfit, two nipple clamps and a short but firm whip?"Helen has some advice. When you take your lady to the bar, keep your eyes in your head and take the swivel out of your neck. And don't be lookin around the room when she's in the john with all her friends. She'll sneak up behind you and smack the crap out of you. Then all the shit hits the fan and I have to come over there and throw everybody out. Be warned!
Beat me, beat me, whip me till I bleed!
Beam Me Up Scotty! Ever talk to a computer?< Go check out A.L.I.C.E. and "talk" to this Artificial Intelligence bot. I jacked around with it the other day, but couldn't talk her into to coming over for any wild trick f***ing.
Coming Soon: The History of Beer
Cheers!