After Your Fifth Drink....
For your entertainment today, I have a funny list of stuff that happens after your fifth drink. I can't remember where I grabbed this from, therefore I cannot give the proper credits. If you've seen it somewhere else, let me know.
See if you can pick which one is Harvey!
Numbers 1-20 of 207:
- After your fifth drink, you’re like Don Juan with the ladies: They Don Juan nothing to do with you.
- You suspect that water, taken in small quantities, isn’t all that dangerous.
- You occasionally have meals with your wine.
- You wake up every morning at the crack of ice.
- You drink to forget you drink.
- You distrust camels, or anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
- People get drunk by shaking your hand.
- You never eat breakfast on an empty stomach.
- Beer is the reason you get up every afternoon.
- The only drinking problem you have is the two-hands/one-mouth thing.
- Your house is so messy because it spins like a top every time you lie down.
- You drink to steady yourself, and sometimes you get so steady you can’t move.
- You never walk, you just occasionally stagger in a straight line.
- You get angry because there’s always so much booze left at the end of your money.
- You think that drunks are a lot like chess players, only drunk.
- You forgot your fishing pole on your fishing trip and didn’t notice.
- You’ve been laid out on more floors than Johnson’s Wax.
- Your liver has hired an attorney.
- You wish all the world’s parking lots could be somehow turned into lush rain forests, because, you know, it’s hard to hide from cops in a parking lot.
- Your favorite bar installed a seat belt on your barstool.
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by
Madfish Willie on January 10
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Comments (2)
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Funny Stuff
those are killer, Barkeep...especially #7 and #14...
I confess, I'm all about #1