This place is special. . . like "short bus" special

I'm here working my ass off for free because Madfish is a cheap sumbitch guest bartending for Madfish, and he really needs the help. There are things in this place in need of definite improvement.

First off, one of the beers he has on tap tastes like piss... wait.. it is piss...

The man has some strange goddamn customers...

Anyway, the only thing I could get to come in on the cheap ass flea market satellite dish he has duct taped to the roof of the bar was C-Span, which was showing the 2005 UN's World Women's Issue Conference. The off button wouldn't work on the TV, no matter how badly I beat the filthy Guatemalan kid Madfish keeps under the bar as a remote control.

Since the only other option was to stick an icepick into my brain (and I couldn't find an icepick) so I was forced to listen...

At the 2005 World Women's conference, the first speaker from Canada, stood up "At last years conference we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference I went home and told my husband I would no longer cook for him, and that he would have to do it himself. Afer the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb".

The crowd stood up, applauded and cheered.

The second speaker, from France, stood up
"After last years conference I went straight home and told my husband that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that not only had he done his own, but my washing as well".

Once again the audience rose to their feet, applauded and cheered.

The third speaker, from Scotland stood up "After last year's conference ah went home and tolt ma man that I widnae doo his cookin, cleanin or shoppin, and he wid hiftae doo it himsell. After the first day I saw nothin, after the second day I saw nothin, but after the third day, I could see a wee bit oota ma left eye"

I shoulda beat on the kid harder....