Texas Talking

[Originally posted on October 16, 2003]

Here in Texas, everything IS bigger and better! We even have own own vocabulary called: Texas Talkin'

Here's what the heck we mean in the Lone Star State...

  • The engine's runnin' but ain't nobody driving = Not too smart

  • As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party = An unwelcome person

  • Tighter than bark on a tree = Stingy

  • Big hat, no cattle = All talk, no action

  • We've howdied but we ain't shook yet = We've met, but haven't been formally introduced

  • He thinks the sun come up just to hear him crow = He thinks his s#%! doesn't stink

  • She's got tongue enough for ten rows of teeth = She's a talker

  • It's so dry the trees are bribin' the dogs = Rain would be nice

  • Just because a chicken has wings doesn't mean it can fly = Appearances can be deceiving

  • This ain't my first rodeo = I've been around the block

  • He looks like the dog's been keepin' him under the porch = U-G-L-Y

  • They ate supper before they said grace = They're living in sin

  • Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope = Stop arguing and do as you're told

  • As full of wind as a corn-eating horse = A braggart

  • You can put your boots in the oven, but that doesn't make them biscuits = You can say whatever you want, but that doesn't change a thing


ยป by Madfish Willie on June 26 :: Permalink :: Comments (3) :: Best of Madfish

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Heh. I'll bet you've been the target of most of these phrases at one point or another :-P

Posted by: Harvey on June 26, 2004 11:15 AM


My favorite phrase is:

"I've been to a few rodeos."

And whatta ya know? I'm from Texas!

Posted by: Emma on June 28, 2004 12:14 PM

Being a lifetime Texas country boy, I'll chip in a couple.

Chip in a couple = Contribute some

tighter than Dick's hat band = cheap, or an extremely tight spot

Make hay while the sun shines=take advantage of opportunity when it is presented

cow pissing on a flat rock=torrential rains

Eat corn-on-the-cob through a picket fence = ugly with buck teeth

Nice hat, do you got two of them?=Ugly hat, one to sh!t in and one to cover it up with.

Qt. of tator salad shy of a full picnic=not all there

Watch out for the gators=watch out for the gators

Plenty of time to rest when they bury you=Get ready to work your ass off, esp. on Sunday.

roach killers=pointed toe cowboy boots

10 million ants cant be wrong=good picnic/cookout

putting lipstick on a pig=waste of time

kitchen pass=okay from the wife

can peaches (preserves)="special" time with the wife (girlfriend)

burr in saddle=asshole

dry hole=no more opportunity left

well came in=struck it rich

well tapped out=broke

you better comprendez, or, do you comprendez this?=I know you can speak english, asshole.

gay bull=not throwing any calves

got his nuts cut off=had authority removed by a higher power

useful as tits on a boar hog=not very useful

fixin to (usually pronounced 'fidna')= making preparations to do something

Geez, all I got to do is listen to myself talk. I may compile a list.

Posted by: Don Callaway on June 30, 2004 11:28 PM