Moe's Toast...
"Here's to the ladies,
They need no praise...
They speak for themselves!"
Bart's Call to Moe
[This isn't at Moe's; Moe is taking over as the substitute teacher for Mrs. Krabappel's class during the strike]
OK, when I call your name, uh, you say "present" or "here". Er, no, say "present". Ahem, Anita Bath?
The students in the classroom laugh
All right, settle down. Anita Bath here?
More laughs
All right, fine, fine. Maya Buttreeks!
Still more laughs
Hey, what are you laughing at? What? Oh, oh, I get it, I get it. It's my big ears, isn't it, kids? Isn't it? Well, children, I can't help that!
Moe runs out of the classroom crying as Bart crosses Moe's name off of a list of what are now former substitute teachers
Today's Drinking Story
Pub Crawling
Yogism: "Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical."
Things A Man Should Know: About Women:
If you're single, the tango will do the trick. If you're married, the tango will also do the trick.
Possibly even with your wife.
ClueBat Insults
Thou bawdy, bat-fowling giglet!
Movie Madness
Tales of The Blode - Episode 2: A Trip to the Seaside
Dumb-Ass Kangaroo Jokes
First Kangaroo: Why did the little girl take hay to bed?
First Kangaroo: Why did the rabbit go to the doctor?
First Kangaroo: What happened to the two bedbugs who fell in love?
First Kangaroo: Why can't you tell secrets on a farm?
First Kangaroo: What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?
First Kangaroo: What's smarter than a talking horse?
First Kangaroo: What did the duck say when it laid a square egg?
First Kangaroo: When is it socially correct to serve milk in a saucer?
First Kangaroo: How do you tell the difference between an elephant and a rhinoceros?
First Kangaroo: What does a frog say when it washes car windows?
Today's Foreign Language Party Cookie is Surinam (click thru for the really good stuff)
yu kao'lo: your ass
krasi: horny
tongo: french kiss
ie de wang viestie dagoe: you're a vilty dog
Sako webo: ball sack
Cheers!